How Much Trouble Can One Teen Get Into, Anyway?

After reading today’s work read, I think what I really need to do with my life is write the mother of all teen novels.

MY LIFE SUCKS WORSE THAN YOURS by SUPERFAST READER

Our girl is an overachiever from a broken home who was molested by a family friend when she was young. She keeps a journal chronicling her struggles with bulimia and anorexia. After a wild crystal meth-fueled party gets out of control, she ends up dating one of the boys she had sex with that night. They spend most of their time getting drunk together, but when he starts hitting her, she turns to cutting to relieve the pain. She dumps him, but then he starts stalking her so she launches a crusade against premarital sex and gets invited to testify in front of Congress. However, her ex-best friend has become a Queen Bee Mean Girl and frames her in a cheating scandal, so she can’t go. Utterly depressed, our girl attempts suicide. She wakes up on the psych ward where she makes a new best friend and finds love.

The sequel will send her off to college where things REALLY get crazy.

5 thoughts on “How Much Trouble Can One Teen Get Into, Anyway?”

  1. Tell me more! How does she hook up with the meth party? What makes her focus on premarital sex, and divert her attention from the stalker? Is the bulemia really due to gastro-esophageal reflux disease, just mis-diagnosed, and the resulting ulcers are what (mostly) hurts so bad?

    But really.

    I see the ‘Nancy Drew’ movie is coming out soon. Nancy Drew was an arch heroine for years, squeaky clean, and only in trouble when someone framed or misunderstood her. If you get a chance, look at ‘Beka Cooper’ or ‘Wild Magic’, Tamora Pierce. Or ‘Deerskin’, Robyn McKinley. Deerskin is as gritty as it gets, a moving novel, much darker than most of her work.

    You left out some of the other contributing complications — social and peer ostracism, amoral guardians, and undisciplined home life. Oops! The ‘undisciplined’ is implied — she keeps making gruesome life choices. My bad.

  2. Wow. Bulemia, anorexia, sexual abuse AND meth? What, no HIV? How is the still alive to attend college?

    Sounds you like you read a classic there. 😀

  3. HIV!! I knew I forgot something 🙂

    Welcome, Brad!

    I’m a big fan of Tamora Pierce & other fantasy writers–hopefully my child (boy or girl) will be into fantasy as well.

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